Some people claim that it is necessary to improve all the time – continuous improvement, they call it. Continuous learning should make you wiser all the time, they say, and you can use that new wisdom to improve the way you work, the processes.
But you know better! You will never even think about improving anything, because:
- You are perfect! Everything you do is of maximum quality and could not have been done any better by anyone else. Not that you ever asked them, of course. Why would you do that when you already know the answer? And asking your users or clients what they think would be ridiculous! What do they know? They hired you as an expert, right? Right! And that was because they needed your brilliant wisdom, which they knew that you had, and your unparalleled skills, which they were sure of. So their knowledge and judgement really isn’t worth anything.
- You are overworked! You do so much each day that adding even more work would be impossible. The fact that you can even do what you already do is somewhat of a miracle. Those who claim that you could make your processes more efficient, so that you afterwards would have better time for everything, they know nothing: work is hard, it must be hard, nobody ever came sleeping to a success! “Give me some more work that I can put into the ever-increasing backlog” is your motto!
- Processes? What is that? You just do your work!
- Your work is so advanced and unique that you cannot have any processes for it. Less even improve those. And now they must stop suggesting such things, so that you can try to concentrate on inventing something you are going to call a wheel!
- Improve, they say? They don’t want improvement! If you improved the processes, then everything would happen too fast for the users and clients, and then they would need to run much faster – and do they want that?!
- You believe in learning by experiments! “Let everything be done randomly”, you say, “and the users and clients will end up like all Einsteins!”
- You believe in learning from your mistakes! Do they want you to be an idiot? No, so you want to make as many mistakes as possible and become very clever!
- You think of your colleagues! Of course, you could improve processes for yourself, but then those poor colleagues of you would not be able to follow troupe – no, no, it is necessary (for them) to walk slowly, take some steps to the side and sit down now and then. That will make them feel more confident.
- Improve the processes? And then what happens when we are twice as efficient? Then you will fire half of us! No, let us all work at half speed so that nobody will get fired.
- That is not how you do it here! You have always done things your way, and now some wiseguys from somewhere else want to tell you that this is wrong? That certainly was not invented here! They should just leave you alone, you know better!
- You have already done that – it was a disaster! Now you are all occupied with cleaning up this mess and get everything back to normal!
- You have already done that – it was a success! You had some consultants make some nice maps, and the users and clients liked them very much – and they certainly should, because it was very expensive! And you had a great party afterwards! You still remember it – it was before you got married, so… what a party! Today, with three children and two mothers in law it would not be nearly as funny. So now everything is optimized, nothing to improve at your place.